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Title : Outmatched
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Outmatched

I can’t do it you guys. I just can’t do it anymore. 

I can’t keep up with the ever-downward rolling tide of shit and associated kid noise that's somehow become the 24/7 soundtrack of my life, especially with two days of dreaded school "in-service." 

I feel like Sisyphus pushing a laundry basket up a hill of Perler beads draped in homemade Borax-based slime and other "experiments." And my only recourse is to retreat into the internet in a way that my kids will definitely identify in therapy someday as my greatest maternal failing.

I'm completely outmatched, and I am giving up now because it's easier than thinking about solving this problem, much less doing anything to actually solve it. Oh I purge shit periodically, but there's always more shit where that came from, and it feels like trying to stop a tidal wave with a thimble.

I know there are things I could do. There's that smug Marie Kondo and her joy-sparking and Swedish Death Cleaning and who the fuck knows what other trendy hoarder detox programs that are supposed to magically turn my house into a quiet empty shell of peace, containing nothing but a spoon and a vase with a single fresh orchid sticking out of it.

Not gonna happen. 

For now, I'm at least one American Girl Doll homeless encampment, three bongo drums, and about 700 tattered books and raggedy-ass stuffed animals away from inner peace borne of molting possessions and emerging from a chrysalis of consumerism into a self-righteous dawn of stuff-less, chaos-free enlightenment.

Two nights ago I was sitting in my shit hole of a living room with my kids, their two friends, and the friends' dad. The adults were trying to have a conversation, and we were shouting over each other at top volume like we were at a Metallica concert. 

It struck me at that moment that this was just my life now. The background noise of any given evening is 10% mellifluous laughter of little children, 10% annoying laughter of little children, 60% sibling fighting, and 20% adult reactive adult temper tantrums to the 60% of sibling fighting.

And we are only just finishing day one of a four-day weekend. Seriously, I 100% give up.

Thus Article Outmatched

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